10.05.2008

Tender tootsies

Not so early this morning I was moving Sketch back to his own bed and tripped on something. I'm not sure what it was - my jammie pants, the bed skirt, the boppy, a random assortment of dirty laundry - whatever it was, I lost my balance and pitched forward toward the ground. I reached out to grab anything I could to stop my fall and keep Sketch in my arm. The closest thing was the pack-n-play (where Sketch has been sleeping in our room) and frankly, I'm surprised it held up to the force of my impact. In the process I managed to curl two toes under under my foot and jam them pretty hard into the floor. Somehow Sketch slept through the whole 0.2 second long experience and the slew of mild obscenities that unwittingly slipped out under my breath. I put him in his bed and climbed back into my own. Sleep was only slightly slow to come and I fell back into unconsciousness until Sketch again waked, demanding immediate nourishment.

I spent the rest of the day hobbling around like a gimpy old man, aggressively protecting my foot from the wild children that rule this roost. For the most part I fared well, although Thing 3 caught me distracted and stepped squarely on those two tender tootsies. Why is it they always think it's funny when you scream in pain?

Evening eventually rolled around and Nate wrapped my toes with adhesive tape - again with that "not enough time in the day" problem. Apparently medical technology hasn't improved much since 1992 - the year I broke my big toe on Kuuipo's shin. The recommended course of treatment is still tape and time. Although I doubt the toes are broken they still hurt something fierce (I'm convinced that under my fabulous red nail polish are nasty purple toenails - not that I'll ruin my pedicure to check.) Really, with all the miraculous advances in medical science you'd think someone would come up with a way to speed the healing process. By the time my current limp is gone I'll have a new one from the ankle damage due to overcompensation. It's a vicious, vicious cycle.

The moral of the story? Getting out of bed can be seriously hazardous to your health.

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